In Search of Glee: The Woeful Clippers' Climb To Greatness

[Tim Moungey]

I agree with you. If I had control of the lineup, I would have put Curry at SG and kept Felton at PG, but I'm letting the AI coach set the lineup and sub matrix. It's more realistic and more satisfying when I win that way.

[Tim Moungey]

I guess the Nuggets really were better than everyone thought, because they won every single series in 5 or 6 games, including beating the Bulls in 5 in the Finals for Denver's first championship.

Chicago upset Miami in 7 games in the second round, then got past Orlando, also in 7 games. Talk about the Bulls running the Florida Gauntlet.

Lottery
14. Portland Trailblazers
13. Utah Jazz
12. Oklahoma City Thunder
11. Milwaukee Bucks
10. Memphis Grizzlies
9. Philadelphia 76ers
8. Cleveland Cavaliers
7. Phoenix Suns
6. Washington Bullets
5. Detroit Pistons
4. Minnesota Timberwolves (-3)
3. Charlotte Bobcats
2. Toronto Raptors
1. Sacramento Kings (+3)

I'm getting misty-eyed. Not because of the Kings' luck and the Timberwolves' misfortune. Because of this episode of The Wonder Years. The one with Kevin and the piano recital. I get teary eyed and nauseous at the same time, and the feeling is a combination that makes me hate watching it.

I think it affects me so much for two reasons:
1) The episode deals with the arts and competition, something I felt keenly as a creative writer before I became a GM and pursued the sports dream instead of the fictional one. Something I still feel deeply, having given up writing, other than these poorly written notes.

2) Part of the beauty of The Wonder Years is that it aired at a time when a generation of boys were in middle and high school, and many of us could identify with the situations Kevin gets into. It was also brilliantly written and, because it's set in the '60s, it gave many of us a connection with our parents, who grew up during that decade. In short, it was a perfect storm television series.

For those of us who were part of that generation during the series' original air date, it remains our favorite and we still have intense visceral reactions to the episodes.

It's still my favorite series, although I can't say it's the greatest series of all time. That distinction belongs to The Wire. Before The Wire, though, I would have said The Wonder Years was the greatest TV show of all time.

But this is getting off track. You want to hear about the Clippers, not about the GM.

On to the awards.

MVP
Dwight Howard - Orlando Magic - 24 PPG 15.5 RPG 1.0 SPG 3.9 BPG
Defensive Player of the Year
Dwight Howard - Orlando Magic - 24 PPG 15.5 RPG 1.0 SPG 3.9 BPG
6th Man of the Year
Samuel Dalembert - Sacramento Kings - 7.2 PPG 6.9 RPG 1.4 BPG
Rookie of the Year
Tiago Splitter - San Antonio Spurs - 15.2 PPG 7.4 RPG 1.4 BPG
Coach of the Year
Steve Van Gundy - Orlando Magic

All-NBA 1st Team
PG Chris Paul - New Orleans Hornets
SG Kobe Bryant - Los Angeles Lakers
SF Carmelo Anthony - Denver Nuggets
PF Dirk Nowitzki - Dallas Mavericks
C Dwight Howard - Orlando Magic

I personally would have given CP3 the MVP, but Howard is a strong choice.

All-NBA 2nd Team
PG Steve Nash - Phoenix Suns
SG Brandon Roy - Portland Trailblazers
SF Kevin Durant - Oklahoma City Thunder
PF Pau Gasol - Los Angeles Lakers
C Marc Gasol - Memphis Grizzlies

Very, very cool to see the Gasol brothers on the same All-NBA team.

All-NBA 3rd Team
PG Jason Kidd - Dallas Mavericks
SG Joe Johnson - Atlanta Hawks
SF Danny Granger - Indiana Pacers
PF David Lee - Golden State Warriors
C Yao Ming - Houston Rockets

Wow. Stephen Curry got robbed IMO.

All-Defense 1st Team
PG Chris Paul - New Orleans Hornets
SG Dwayne Wade - Miami Heat
SF Gerald Wallace - Charlotte Bobcats
PF Josh Smith - Atlanta Hawks
C Dwight Howard - Orlando Magic

All-Defense 2nd Team
PG Rajon Rondo - Boston Celtics
SG Kobe Bryant - Los Angeles Lakers
SF Andre Iguodala - Philadelphia 76ers
PF Pau Gasol - Los Angeles Lakers
C Andrew Bogut - Milwaukee Bucks

All-Rookie 1st Team
PG John Wall - Washington Wizards
SG Evan Turner - Philadelphia 76ers
SF Gordon Hayward - Utah Jazz
PF Tiago Splitter - San Antonio Spurs
C Nikola Pekovic - Minnesota Timberwolves

All-Rookie 2nd Team
PG Grevis Vasquez - Memphis Grizzlies
SG Xavier Henry - Memphis Grizzlies
SF Al-Farouq Aminu - Portland Trailblazers
PF Greg Monroe - Detroit Pistons
C Cole Aldrich - Oklahoma City Thunder

Boo. No awards for the Clippers.

Donald Sterling is pissy that we didn't get past the Nuggets and give him more playoff revenue. Then he gets even madder when I tell him we'll be right at the cap next season and back in the playoffs. He tells me I need to be under the cap.

Go to hell, Sterling.

But I'll stick with this team for another year. Clippers fans deserve better than they've had in their past.

Mock Draft Notes
PF Ryan Hoiberg from Wake Forest seems to be the consensus #1, but for my money, 7'4, 298 lb. center from Indiana, Chris Johnson, is the single best player in the draft.

We're tabbed to take PF Johnnie Gardner from UNC at #20. Really? You think I'm taking a 6'8 PF? Yeah, no.

Looking over our roster, PF is definitely our biggest need, but I wouldn't say no to depth at SF or a pass-first PG either.

I invite a broad range of prospects to work out, including C Brad Jones, UNLV's lone prospect, and Spain's only prospect, SF Eutor Taffarel, as I have affinity for both those places, obviously.

Let's see how this draft goes.

[Tim Moungey]

2011 Draft - 1st Round
1. PF Ryan Hoiberg - Sacramento Kings

I get a trade offer right off the bat. Two of them. Detroit offers Charlie Villanueva and Will Bynum for Raymond Felton. ...Yeah, no. Miami offers me a scrub for one of my scrubs and even though their scrub is better, I don't want to give them any satisfaction or risk cutting into Eric Bledsoe's PT, so I decline.

2. PF Germayne Postell - Toronto Raptors

...Wow. Not Johnson. Crazy. Another offer, this one Danny Granger for Joakim Noah. Blockbuster and a half. It'd kill us in the post, but Granger was a very worthy All-NBA 3rd Team and he gives us that scoring star we need to give Stephen Curry some help. He's also an excellent defender.

On the other hand, we have Nicolas Batum, a great defender in his own right, and one of my personal favorite players. Noah has also been our glue guy at center.

Hell with it. I take it and I'll review the deal later.

3. SG Nick Perry - Charlotte Bobcats

Hmm. This is familiar. College hero goes to local team. In this case, literally so, as Perry played for UNC-Charlotte. I finally get around to looking at our scouting reports and ...yeah, I see why Chris Johnson is slipping. Some worrying signs about him.

4. PF Arlon Knight - Minnesota Timberwolves
5. SF Brandon Molnar - Detroit Pistons

Another offer, but I'm not going to post them all, especially when they're as dull as this one.

6. C Brad Jones - Washington Wizards

...****. He shouldn't be up this high. I call Washington to see if they want to cut a deal. No go. Damn it. I want my Runnin' Rebel at center.

But the Wizards refuse everything I throw at them, including Batum and Felton. Sigh.

7. SG Rodney Perry - Phoenix Suns
8. PF Wesley Worrell - Cleveland Cavaliers (Boo UNR).
9. C Chris Johnson - Philadelphia 76ers

Even though he has his issues, I think the 76ers got fantastic value here. But we can't always build around Hoosier stars.

10. PG Mills Jolly - Memphis Grizzlies
11. SG Andrew Kirtz - Milwaukee Bucks
12. SG Derrick Cockle - Oklahoma City Thunder

Can I just say 6'8 SGs warm the cockles of my heart? They really do.

13. SG Richard Gattison - Utah Jazz
14. PF Ilian Halilovic - Portland Trailblazers

So the lottery's done. There's exactly one player left on our board and I'm frantic to get him.

So frantic I offer #20, #46, and the Knicks' 2012 2nd to the Pacers to move up and nab our guy.

15. SF Eutor Taffarel - Los Angeles Clippers

The analysts shred the pick, asking what in the world we're doing with this guy when we have Nicolas Batum and just traded for Danny Granger. They also hated on Taffarel as a prospect. They can go to hell. I stand by my man Eutor, who looked really, really good when he came in for his private workout, especially on offense.

16. PG Hector Simmons - New York Knicks
17. SF Chris Crosby - Minnesota Timberwolves
18. PG Cameron Risinger - Sacramento Kings
19. SF James Layne - New Jersey Nets
20. PF Johnnie Gardner - Indiana Pacers

...Impressive. Right guy, right slot. Just wrong team.

21. C Sam Kitt - Golden State Warriors
22. SF Clint Walker - Houston Rockets
23. PF Brian Roberts - Dallas Mavericks
24. PG Kenyate Hamilton - San Antonio Spurs
25. PF Tim Hampton - New Orleans Hornets
26. PF Steve Beck - Boston Celtics
27. PG James Montague - Los Angeles Lakers
28. SF Ed Yarbrough - Orlando Magic

Superb value for the spot. If we'd kept 20 and our guy was gone, Yarbrough prob would have been the choice. 6'10 is awesome.

29. SG Josh Lawson - Denver Nuggets
30. C Renard Charity - Miami Heat

Yes, because a 6'9 center is what the Heat needed. Skinny dudes don't win you championships, Bron Bron.

Sadly, Taffarel does not look nearly as good as I thought he would at first look post-draft. I feel like kind of an ass now. Brad Jones doesn't look worthy of the #6 pick, but he's definitely good enough to start. Chris Johnson looks pretty bad on defense.

I still try and trade for the big Hoosier anyway, but the 76ers are being assholes about it.

Forget it. I'll try again tomorrow.

Oh and Ryan Hoiberg is indeed a future All-Star. Iffy consistency and durability, but very much a promising young man.

[Myles Nelson]

Interested to see how you play out your SF situation. Having Granger, Taffarel and Batum makes a nice dilemma, although losing Joakim Noah obviously hurts.

[PointGuard]

) Part of the beauty of The Wonder Years is that it aired at a time when a generation of boys were in middle and high school, and many of us could identify with the situations Kevin gets into. It was also brilliantly written and, because it's set in the '60s, it gave many of us a connection with our parents, who grew up during that decade. In short, it was a perfect storm television series.

Yeah, shhhurrrrr! And it had NOTHING to do with Winnie Cooper.

[Tim Moungey]

Yeah, shhhurrrrr! And it had NOTHING to do with Winnie Cooper.

Winnie was cute, but for my money, it doesn't get any better than...
















Madeline

[Tim Moungey]

Interested to see how you play out your SF situation. Having Granger, Taffarel and Batum makes a nice dilemma, although losing Joakim Noah obviously hurts.

Yeah I"m kicking myself right now. It's a bad scene, man.

[Tim Moungey]

So let's review trades, shall we?

Los Angeles Clippers receive
SF Danny Granger

Indiana Pacers receive
C Joakim Noah

What this means for the Clippers
Shocking trade, as Noah was a Jestor favorite from his college days and the dirty presence down low the Clippers needed. On the other hand, he faded down the stretch and disappeared against the Nuggets. Granger was All-NBA 3rd Team last season and is a superlative scorer and shut down defender. He gives the Red and White a #1 to take the pressure off Stephen Curry and a franchise star opposing teams will have to try and solve.

What this means for the Pacers
Noah finds himself back in the Central and he'll slot in beautifully at C, allowing Indiana to move the underachieving Roy Hibbert to PF, where the latter's 7'2 frame can hopefully mask some of his liabilities. Indiana now needs a new #1, but is their team going to be good enough to lure in a superstar with their $25 million in cap space?

Winner: Draw
Both teams are taking a major risk here, the Pacers dealing their franchise star for one of the most underrated big men in the league, the Clippers banking on Timofey Mozgov to become their center of the future. We do have to wonder what LA is going to do with their logjam at SF with Granger, Nicolas Batum, and recent 1st round pick Eutor Taffarel.

***

Los Angeles Lakers receive
SF Austin Daye

Detroit Pistons receive
SG Shannon Brown

What this means for the Lakers
Could find a role as an accurate shooting reserve, but right now he's buried on the inactive list, and free agency isn't even here yet.

What this means for the Pistons
Disciplined defender, but otherwise unremarkable. The 25 year old will fight for playing time with Ben Gordon and Charlie Villaneuva.

Winner: Pistons
Detroit looks like they'll use Brown, whereas Daye will rot away on the Lakers' bench.

**

Philadelphia 76ers receive
PG Cameron Risinger

Sacramento Kings receive
PF Marreese Speights

What this means for the 76ers
18th overall pick has some upside as a respectable fifth starter/backup point guard. The only question is, why another PG when they already have Louis Williams and Jrue Holiday on the roster?

What this means for the Kings
Speights is just another guy. Nothing remarkable about him at all.

Winner: Philadelphia
The former Terrapin Risinger's upside makes the 76ers the clear winner considering they gave up nobody worth mentioning to get him. Philly now has a strong 3 PG rotation to run alongside Evan Turner.

**

Indiana Pacers receive
C Hassan Whiteside

Sacramento Kings receive
SG Brandon Rush

What this means for the Pacers
He's raw, but if he develops, Whiteside will be an excellent defender, shotblocker, and foul drawer and his 7' height will intimidate teams with smaller frontlines. Indiana's definitely serious about upgrading its big man stocks with quality young defenders down low.

What this means for the Kings
26 year old has good size for the 2 at 6'6, 210 and shows some ability with the 3 point ball. Slightly above average defense and a stopgap reserve until Tyreke Evans comes back from his ACL injury.

Winner: Pacers
We really like what Indiana is doing with their frontcourt this offseason. They may not make the playoffs next year, which gives them a shot to find the #1 option they need in the lottery. West is very deep, ad Rush isn't good enough to be adequate cover off the bench.

**

Oklahoma City Thunder receive
PG C.J. Watson

Chicago Bulls receive
PF D.J. White
C Byron Mullens

What this means for the Thunder
Watson, 27, is a ball secure point guard, with tantalizing upside as a perimeter defender and ballthief. The perfect complement to Russell Westbrook off the bench and better than Eric Maynor or project 2nd round pick Peter Hendricks.

What this means for the Bulls
Two young scrubs are still scrubs, but Mullens is at least a 7' body and the only center on the roster besides Omer Asik. Think Da Bulls miss Joakim Noah yet?

Winner: Thunder
Chicago was desperate to add big bodies and they gave away a quality rotational piece to get wastes of space. Nice steal by OKC.

**

New Orleans Hornets receive
C Ian Manhinmi

Dallas Mavericks receive
C Aaron Gray

What this means for the Hornets
Manhinmi's lone talent - 63.4% shooting. Too bad he doesn't have enough of a scoring instinct to be of real value.

What this means for the Mavericks
Gray is a better all-around talent than Manhinmi, but that's like saying Fat Chick #1 at the bar has a better all around personality over Fat Chick #2's few less fat rolls.

Winner: Nobody
Either way, these teams are going home with a fat chick. Manhinmi (Fat Chick #2) doesn't have enough fewer fat rolls to make a a difference and Gray (Fat Chick #1) is the type of carryout we call diving on a grenade to take one for the team.

**

Denver Nuggets receive
SG James Anderson

San Antonio Spurs receive
PG Ty Lawson

What this means for the Nuggets
Anderson has good scoring pop and is a great long-range gunner. Solid without being spectacular in other areas, with that 6'6, 208 frame to make him hard to stop. One of the few bright spots in last year's dull class, and a veritable steal at #20. It wouldn't be horrible if he ended up starting for the defending champions, who renounced almost no one, including Kenyon Martin's $24 million price tag.

What this means for the Spurs
Accurate as hell shooter with shut down defender potential. Doesn't have anywhere close to Anderson's scoring instincts, though, which is his big drawback. Has upside to become a passable floor general, although nothing outstanding, more on the fifth starter/reserve type. Big, big addressing of a need, as he provides San Antonio a legitimate option behind starter George Hill.

Winner: Draw
Should work out very well for both teams and their needs.

**

New Orleans Hornets receive
SF Damion James

New Jersey Nets receive
SF Quincy Pondexter

What this means for the Hornets
The former Longhorn was a quality starter last year... in the D-Leagues.

What this means for the Nets
Another good D-League guy, Pondexter at least has upside as a defender and offensive rebounder for a wing. That's more can be said for James.

Winner: New Jersey
Why did the Hornets even take James? Chris Paul can't be happy.

And finally...

Charlotte Bobcats receive
PF Jordan Hill

Houston Rockets receive
PG D.J. Augustin

What this means for the Bobcats
Hill isn't worth his #8 pick status two years ago, but he has some upside to be an offensive minded rotational big of some worth.

What this means for the Rockets
Augustin was a pleasant surprise last year, shooting 40.1% from 3 point range and averaging 12.6 points in 33 starts, 81 games played. A very nice reserve PG to have, especially with his accuracy and handling. Between starter Aaron Brooks, #2 Kyle Lowry, and Augustin, Houston now looks quite deep at the 1.

Winner: Houston
On talent alone, the Rockets win. Charlotte did shore up their horrific frontcourt depth with Hill, but he doesn't bring nearly the value that Augustin does.

[Tim Moungey]

Summer League
Before the summer league, I picked up Stephen Curry's fourth year option and Eric Bledsoe's third and fourth year options.

Stephen Curry
Eric Bledsoe
Nicolas Batum
Eutor Taffarel
Timofey Mozgov

Five guys going to the Summer league and that could practically be our starting lineup right there.

126-83 rout of the Cavaliers to kick things off. Stephen Curry with 21 points, invitee Marc Gasol with 21 points and 12 rebounds, and Eric Bledsoe with 15 points, 8 assists and 0 turnovers off the bench. Eutor Taffarel looked great shooting the ball - 8 of 17 for 17 points.

Marc Gasol is fast establishing himself as our #1 target in free agency, posting 21 points and 11 rebounds in our 123-103 win over Orlando. Eutor Taffarel continues to justify me by going 9/15 for 21 points. Rudy Fernandez scores 17 bench points, Eric Bledsoe 11. Yes, we have 3 Spanish nationals on this summer league team.

Our first loss of the summer league goes via the 76ers, 112-99. Eutor Taffarel goes 7/10, 5/5 from 3 point range for 20 points and 3 blocks, holding his own against the far more celebrated Evan Turner, who scored 21. Eric Bledsoe was the only other player of note, scoring 11 bench points.

106-79 bounceback win over the Mavericks. Timofey Mozgov highlights the game and is our lone true statistical noteworthy guy with 20 points, 14 rebounds off the bench.

We close out the summer league with the closest game of the season, 96-88 win over Utah. Rudy Fernandez and Eric Bledsoe spark the team with 14 bench points and 12 points, 8 rebounds respectively for the second team. Oh and Timofey Mozgov with 10 bench points.

Damn impressive summer, but Stephen Curry worries me. He didn't take charge of the team like I thought he would and while he showed improvement in his floor general skills, I don't know if he'll ever be the type of starting PG I demand.

It's the 1.5 A/TO ratio in summer league that settles it. I have a specific target in mind, but I'm going to have wait until guys start signing in free agency to pull it off.

By the way, Eutor Taffarel's summer league stats - 15.8 points, 3.8 rebounds, 1 block, 0.8 steals, 1.8 A/TO ratio. The advanced metrics aren't tracked in summer league, which is a shame. I'd love to see his drive stop rate and PA/SF.

Free Agency
What a great time to need a big man. Some of the top bigs:

C Yao Ming
C Greg Oden
C Marc Gasol
C Kendrick Perkins
PF Zach Randolph
PF David West

On the other hand, it's a horrible free agency for point guards. Nobody who fits the Jestorball mold and the best available is Tony Parker.

I would dearly love Randolph, but we don't have the money for him. Greg Oden suffered three different injuries last year, including a broken toe, and I don't like his passing and handling.

So even though it's an overpay and even though Donald Sterling wants us below the cap, I throw every last dollar we have at Marc Gasol.

And we get him! 5 years, $77.5 million. I had better be right about this, because Sterling's screaming in my ear about the money and if we don't produce, I'm so fired.

While I'm doing some phone calls, I notice Chris Johnson tore his knee tendon and is out his entire rookie year. Bad deal.

Unfortunately, despite my repeated calls around the league, nobody is willing to take Ryan Gomes's contract with the player option he has. Sure he's a little overpaid, but it's only a two year contract and he's a decent player - just not suited to PF, which Vinny Del Negro keeps insisting on.

It's irritating, but I'll just see how the starting lineup plays out after training camp.

Getting back to free agency, the Orlando Magic grab Yi Jianlian for 4 years, $23.6 million. Must be trying to become a bigger player in China. On the same day, they re-sign Vince Carter to a 3 year, $27.8 million dollar deal with a player option. Oh, Orlando. How you'll regret that, I think.

Chicago steals Kendrick Perkins for 2 years, $11.8 million. Nice contract for the Bulls. A bunch of offer sheets come in that same day, but I'm stunned to see the Dallas Mavericks sign Tony Parker to a 4 year, $23.6 million deal. Sure, it has a team option, but where's the Baron Davis love?

Samuel Dalembert's crazy hair goes to the Celtics on a 1 year, $5.9 million, I think was. Perkins was better, but whatevs. Yao and Oden re-sign with their teams.

...HOLY ****! Oklahoma City signs Zach Randolph for 5 years, $68.2 million, or almost $10 million LESS than I signed Gasol for. My sad little consolation is that Z-Boobs will be 33 in the last year of that contract, and probably an albatross, while my Gasol bro will be 30 and still going strong.

In other big news, Washington gets Reggie Williams for 5 years, $29.5 million. I only notice or care because I hear some guy with the Raptors likes him.

Boston keeps loading up on old dudes, signing Peja Stojakovic to a 1 year deal.

Nice grab by Cleveland, getting Arron Afflalo for 2 years, $11.8 million. That's going to be a fun, scoring backcourt to watch with Mo Williams.

GOD DAMN IT, MINNESOTA! CURRY CAN EFFING PLAY SHOOTING GUARD! HE'S A BETTER SHOOTING GUARD THAN THE DUDE I'M TRADING FOR! STOP BEING ASSHOLES! I HATE YOU!!!!!

This is my head about to explode as teams continue to mock me. I'm about ready to throw my phone and my laptop at the wall.

So we start looking at backup options and hit on one.

Los Angeles Clippers receive
PG Jose Calderon
Toronto Raptors 2012 2nd round pick
Toronto Raptors 2013 2nd round pick
Toronto Raptors 2014 2nd round pick

Toronto Raptors receive
PG Raymond Felton

What this means for the Clippers
Although not a flashy passer, Calderon is one of the most ball secure point guards in the entire league. He's also a $9.7 million expiring and the Clippers get a boatload of high 2nd round draft picks.

What this means for the Raptors
Felton brings defense and defensive playmaking that the Raptors lacked. He's also more of a scoring threat than Calderon, which will help take some of the pressure off Andrea Bargnani. Signed for two more seasons.

Winner: Toronto
They get the best player in this deal and the Clippers are now over the cap, which will raise Donald Sterling's blood pressure even higher than it already is.

...Okay, I'm *this* close to snapping. Nobody ****ing wants Stephen Curry? Really? REALLY?

You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal
You've got to come close to matching the best thing in the deal

EXCUSE ME IF A 23 YEAR OLD 3.5/4.5 STAR POINT GUARD IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU! THAT'S 4.5! TRADING FOR 4.0 STAR BIG MEN!

23 year old star PG, first round pick, 3 high seconds and a 2 arrow overpay? More of the god damned same thing. If I wanted a Trade AI that was this much of an asshole, I'd go get raped in FOF instead. I've seen ripoff GMs in MP leagues that weren't this sadistic.

Just for the fun of it, I see if Golden State would do the tradeback with Curry and Louis Amundson for Blake Griffin. They do the not enough value thing a couple times, so I throw a couple seconds in.

Guess what?

You've got to come close to matching the best thing on our side of the deal if you want to make a trade.

...
...
...

*head snap*

I fire Vinny Del Negro, then hire myself, then fire myself. Jeff Van Gundy, who readers of a prior chronicle will recognize and who wanted to bring back to the pro leagues, is available, so I hire him as head coach. Doesn't change the lineup any but at least I have a coach I like.

I get a bottle of Mountain Dew: Pitch Black, the best soda ever and one that's finally back on the market (at Walgreen's) for a limited time after years of being off the shelves.

Take a drink, review the situation again, and I see a target I really liked who I completely missed before.

Los Angeles Clippers receive
PF Tiago Splitter
San Antonio Spurs 2014 1st round pick

San Antonio Spurs receive
PG Stephen Curry

What this means for the Clippers
The Red and White lacked a PF worthy of note all last season and they score a brilliant pickup here in getting last season's Rookie of the Year in Splitter. The Brazilian still has a ways to go on his development, but should become a shutdown frontcourt defender and a good, high % scorer in the fullness of time. Clippers GM Jestor is banking on the Spurs declining once Tim Duncan retires. This also means Jose Calderon, who is likely more suited to run the offense, takes over at point guard.

What this means for the Spurs
San Antonio now has a dangerous outside/inside combination with Curry and Duncan, and, even better for the Spurs, they'll now have time to develop DeJuan Blair, an undersized but tantalizing prospect who scouts are calling a 2nd round steal if he develops to his potentials. He'll start at PF. The real gamble here, of course, is that the first might blow up in the Spurs' face, but the former Davidson star makes an attractive franchise face for when Timmy D retires.

Winner: Draw
Both teams get major benefits out of this one, but the real winner might be Jestor's heart, as he was overheard swearing at opposing GMs during heated, prolonged trade negotations.

Tranquility after an apoplectic fit is one of the best feelings in the world. It really is.

Back to free agency.

Carl Landry goes to Memphis for 4 years, $26.1 million. Means Atlanta gave up their first for basically nothing last year. That first was Cameron Risinger, who the Kings stupidly turned into Speights, despite having drafted Ryan Hoiberg first overall. But it's not like the Grizzlies win, either. Don't even try telling me Landry comes close to Z-Boobs.

Andrei Kirlenko gets a 1 year, $5.9 mil. deal from the Hawks, speaking of Atlanta. Rudy Fernandez turned his solid play in summer league for us into a two year min-sal deal from the Jazz.

I belatedly realize we're $1.4 million over the cap and only have 12 players. Nobody wants any of my expiring contracts, even for a lousy 2nd round pick. We're even willing to pay 2nd rounders, but no one's budging.

So we go more over the cap, inking Dexter Pittman, the big boy, to a two year min-sal, and one of my favorite pro players of the modern era, Allen "The Answer" Iverson to a one year min-sal.

$3.4 million over the cap.

I may be fired at the end of the season.

Watch me not care.

Although if I can move Ronny Turiaf at some point during the year, we can squeeze under the cap.

Training Camp
Eutor Tarrafel looks to have slightly greater upside than his post-draft camp first look suggested, but nobody else really improved of the young guys, which is a little disappointing. We'll see how it goes during the year.

We're able to get back under the cap after training camp by trading Ronny Turiaf to the Pacers for a couple of second round picks, their 2013 and 2014 selections. I'll take that, especially since I want more playing time for Timofey Mozgov and Dexter Pittman, who I think are diamonds in the rough.

Donald Sterling is so happy about our getting back under the cap, he tells me my job is secure as long as I stick to that. ...Yeah, we'll see.

Preview
East
Miami Heat
Chicago Bulls
New York Knicks
New Jersey Nets
Milwaukee Bucks
West
Oklahoma City Thunder
Dallas Mavericks
Los Angeles Lakers
New Orleans Hornets
Golden State Warriors

In my mind there's a real dropoff between Miami/Chicago and the rest of the East. I'm going to be honest, I actually like the 76ers as the third team in the East. Jrue Holiday and Evan Turner is a great young backcourt, and Tyson Chandler is a very underrated center, who we forgot to bring back.

I absolutely agree with the Thunder #1 in the West. Jeff Green is a weak spot at C, but the rest of that lineup is awesome. Zach "Z-Boobs" Randolph will push them over the top. I'd actually consider the Hornets the #2 team, to be honest. We're slated 11th, but in my opinion, the West is wide open after OKC and New Orleans.

Although the Nuggets managed to win the title after Chauncey Billups tore his ACL, I agree Denver's not going to repeat and could in fact miss the playoffs. James Anderson at PG will kill them in the 140 days before Billups returns.

Los Angeles Clippers 2011 Opening Night Lineup
PG Jose Calderon
SG Eutor Taffarel (R)
SF Danny Granger
PF Tiago Splitter
C Marc Gasol
6th Nicolas Batum (SF)
7th Ryan Gomes (SF/PF)
8th Timofey Mozgov (SF/PF/C)
9th Eric Bledsoe (PG/SG/SF)
10th Allen Iverson (PG/SG)
11th Dexter Pittman (C)
12th Louis Amundson (PF/C)

I forgot Amundson was a UNLV alum, but it's always nice having a Runnin' Rebel at the team. I don't agree with Mozgov and Bledsoe at SF, but hopefullly they won't play there.

I feel like our team is much more talented and deeper than it was last season. Danny Granger, Marc Gasol and Tiago Splitter will power the offense most likely. I'm intrigued to see what Eutor Taffarel does.

[zike_42]

"In other big news, Washington gets Reggie Williams for 5 years, $29.5 million. I only notice or care because I hear some guy with the Raptors likes him."

Zing.